To be afraid of dying is a common feeling that most people in the world have. It is not only for unbelievers, but also for "believers". I was one of them. The reason is: I was not ready to die because I still want to do a lot of things in my life. And the most honest answer is: I knew for sure that if I died at that day, I will be in hell. I don't have any conviction that I will be with God in heaven, even though I had fellowship every week, I just knew that I was a liar, a hypocrite who claim to have fellowship with God, but yet walked in darkness.
I used to be in the middle of people who said "Everybody who has faith is children of God". "Everybody is born again" and "Everybody should believe by faith that you will be with God in heaven after you died." One day the preacher asked the people there, "Which one of you that if this building suddenly collapse and kill us all will enter heaven, please raise up your hand?"
It was a tricky question for if I didn't raise my hand, I would be called "lack of faith". but if I raised my hand, my heart condemned me. I was very sure at that day that I wasn't child of God, I will be in hell if I died (even though I was Christian by birth). But when I looked around, I saw many people whose life were worse than mine raised their hands. They were sure that they will enter the heaven. Then I said to myself, "If this people can enter heaven, why couldn't I?" And I followed them by raising my hand, but deep down in my heart I was convinced that I was a sinner who still served 2 masters: Jesus as my Saviour and mammon as my king. I wanted to be saved, but I didn't want to fully submit to God, I chose to follow my own flesh desires. I want to be king of myself.
My friends, if you still have the same uncertainty like I had, if you are still afraid of dying, let me tell you something. If your heart is not sure about it, don't deceive yourself. It means you still have something that is not right with God, either you still serve 2 masters or you still walk in darkness. In short, you haven't had true repentance experience, you haven't experienced being filled with Holy Spirit. Don't use doctrine of theological reason to justify it. Some people believe that it is just the matter of faith. They are deceiving themselves.
1 Thessalonians 1:4-5
For we know, brothers loved by God, that he has chosen you, because our gospel came to you not simply with words, but also with power, with the Holy Spirit and with deep conviction. You know how we lived among you for your sake.
Do you know that the gospel, the good news, that you are a sinner saved by grace doesn't come to you simply with words, with doctrines or theologies, but with deep conviction? People can say anything to you. "You are children of God, you will go to heaven with your faith, it is God's responsibility to keep you on the track, bla...bla...bla..." Those are doctrines. Your itching ears might love to hear that. Who doesn't love to be called Children of Living God even though you divorced, you do fraud, you commit immorality, adultery, homosexuals, etc? "Yes, everybody is children of God", says the false teacher.
If you are really sincere. let me ask you something. Do you really sure that you will be in heaven when you died? Once again I remind you what Bible said, "The gospel come to you not simply with words, but also with power, with the Holy Spirit and with deep conviction". Are you convinced that Holy Spirit dwell inside you? My friends, It is the matter of imaginary heaven or the real heaven, it is the matter of your eternal salvation or eternal condemnation. You need to think about it and ask yourself, "Does God know me, do I have relationship with God daily?"
If you have the real experiences being in relationship with God the Father through Holy Spirit inside you, in the name of Jesus Christ, you should have already been convinced, not by merely human's words (doctrines) but by Holy Spirit inside you. Nobody needs to convince you about this for God Himself will call you, "My child".
Ephesians 1:13-14
Having believed, you were marked in him with a seal, the promised Holy Spirit, who is a deposit guaranteeing our inheritance until the redemption of those who are God's possession—to the praise of his glory.
I would like to ask you these questions "Do your prayers seem stuck in the top of the roof?" "Does reading Bible seem so boring and make you sleepy?" "Do you have fellowship with other believers?" Sorry, I am talking about fellowship with believers, not fulfilling obligation by going to the church, not being church-goers but your life is indifferent with unbelievers or even worse. You are deceiving yourself if you don't have those experience but justified yourself that you have already got your "heavenly assurance".
Some people will say, "I can speak in tongues, I have gifts of spirit, I can understand many mysteries of God, I have a vision, I have a lot of dreams, God give me revelation, I can pray long, I am church elder, my father is a pastor, I know God and I am sure I will be with Him when I died". The Bible said, ""Not everyone who says to me, 'Lord, Lord,' will enter the kingdom of heaven, but only he who does the will of my Father who is in heaven. Many will say to me on that day, 'Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in your name, and in your name drive out demons and perform many miracles?' Then I will tell them plainly, 'I never knew you. Away from me, you evildoers! (Matthew 7:21-23)'.
I tell you the truth, with doctrines or theological reason, you can justify everything. You can justify that homosexual is biblical, that murderers will enter the kingdom of God, that living together with your spouse is normal, having sex before married is not a taboo, etc. You can justify everything with doctrines and "faith". By "faith", people believe that if they jump from 30th floor, they will not die, by "faith", people believe that they are going to heaven, even though his life is no better than people who don't fear God. Faith is the closed system, the matter just settled immediately once the term "faith" is used. People will say, "Ok, I know we have different faith, you go on your way and I go on my own way. Bye".
Bible said "But even if we or an angel from heaven should preach a gospel other than the one we preached to you, let him be eternally condemned! (Galatians 1:8). My friends, there is only one true Gospel that lead to heaven, but we have a lot of denominations (37000+). Will you risk your life to stick to doctrines or theologies (teaching of men)? Why don't you take time to think about your eternity? Why don't you take time to read your own Bible and ask God to teach you? But before that, why don't you repent of all your sins and commit your life to Jesus Christ FULLY, otherwise, even though your eyes are open, you are blind and no matter how many times you read your Bible a day, you will never come to the knowledge of the truth.
2 Timothy 3:7
Ever learning, and never able to come to the knowledge of the truth.
With doctrines, some people easily said, "Even though my life is indifferent with unbelievers, even though I sinned before God 1000x a day, He is a loving Father, He will forgive me again and again." Or other people say "It is impossible for us to be without sins, we are all human, so why we not continue sinning, since in the end God will justify us through Jesus' blood? And if I ask them, "Why do you think that God will allow you to be in His Holy Presence, but not those unbelievers whose life even better than you, why they should perish in hell but you are not? Their answer is simple, "It is the matter of faith. I believe that Jesus is God, and He died for all my sins, but those unbelievers don't". I am telling you the truth, I have met a lot of Christians who have that kind of reasoning.
So for you, why don't you think that your heart is deceiving you? Both of you will not inherit kingdom of God.
Hebrews 10:26-27
If we deliberately keep on sinning after we have received the knowledge of the truth, no sacrifice for sins is left, but only a fearful expectation of judgment and of raging fire that will consume the enemies of God.
Bible said that "The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure. Who can understand it? (Jeremiah 17:9)". And Bible also said that "Dear friends, if our hearts do not condemn us, we have confidence before God and receive from him anything we ask, because we obey his commands and do what pleases him (1 John 3:21-22). Do you have deep conviction that Holy Spirit is dwelling inside you? If not, the Bible said "Wake up, O sleeper, rise from the dead, and Christ will shine on you (Ephesians 5:14)."
Please do think about this!!! God bless you
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